Daddy’s Tales … by Glenna

This week is the week of our annual bowling family reunion. It always brings back memories of times, places,  and people who have long gone.

My dad was a great oral historian and story teller. I wish I had either recorded or written down all the stories he told with the names of those involved. There were funny stories, scary ones, ones about duplicity and getting even, ones about gun battles and feuds. I remember the stories but have mostly forgotten the old names of those involved.

One story I always remembered and enjoyed was about two men who were neighbors. One had a hog he wanted to fatten up. His neighbor already had a hog or two penned up in a log enclosure for fattening. Back then hogs were marked by the owner and ran free, feeding on the mast in the hills around about. Before they were butchered they would be penned up and fattened on corn and slop.

Anyway, the neighbor with the pen told the other neighbor there was no use building another pen, that he could put his hog in his pen and they would both take turns feeding them. When the hogs got ready to kill, the neighbor with the pen went out at night and had his boys prize up the log and enticed the neighbors hog with slop to stick its head through between the logs, then he let the log down choking the hog to death. Next, he got the hogs head out and went and told the neighbor the hog got sick and died. When the neighbor verified the hog was dead he was going to get rid of it because they would be afraid to eat a sick hog. The neighbor who killed the hog told him not to worry about getting rid of the hog that since it died in his pen he would do it. After the owner left, the man butchered the hog and thought he was real clever because he had tricked the neignbor out of his hog. Back then a hog could mean the difference between a family going hungry or not.

Now, some how the neighbor found out about the trickery. He bided his time. Since their property joined, he made himself a new deed which moved his property line over a few hundred feet and dated it to before his neighbor had bought his property. Back then deeds were just written on paper and dated. They were not recorded at the court house. Whenever there was a property dispute the case was decided by whoever had the oldest deed. He knew if his paper didn’t look older that he would not win his case so he put it up behind the cookstove and smoked it untill it looked really old. Next he took his neighbor to court over the strip of land. Because his deed was dated first and looked so old, he won the case and took his neighbors land, thus getting even for the stolen hog.

There is also another story about two of my ancestors on my Grandma Mary Jane Morgan’s side. This involved two of Mary Jane’s uncles. I don’t remember the names. Anyway, the two were brothers. They lived up on Camp Creek in Leslie County. One had a big corn field just about ready to harvest. The other was up in the mountains logging. The logger accidently let a log loose and it rolled down and destroyed the corn. They fell out over this and even though they lived by each other never again spoke to each other. They both lived for over 20 more years. When one brother got sick and knew he was dying, he made his family promise to bury him around the point so his brother wouldn’t be able to see his grave! And they did!

The Morgan’s are known to be a contrary bunch. My great grandpa morgan was known to get mad at his family and go to bed and wouldn’t get up. He had a big long beard. They said he would lay there and tie his beard in knots when he was upset. He lived to be up in his 80’s. He died after falling through a hole that had been cut out for a staircase on a house that his kin were working on down in Hyden. The house is still there today. Dad said he stepped backward and fell down to the floor below. He lived a couple of days and then died.

Oral tradition says that the first of my Morgan ancestors to come here came from North Carolina after killing a bunch of indians. The story is that some indians raped one of their sisters. The two brothers caught a bunch of indians sleeping in a barn. They bared the doors and set it on fire, burning them all. They had to leave because of this so they came to Kentucky, settling on Camp creek. I don’t know how much of this is true but almost all Morgan oral tradition has some version of a similar story so I guess there is a kernal of truth in this.

There were many stories about ’something’ stalking folks in the woods. Of course, back then there were bears and mountain lions which old timers called ‘panters’. Dad told about him, Lawton, and some others going coon hunting one night. Something started following them, it sounded big. They could hear it breaking twigs. It stayed just outside the light from their pine knots. They finally got so scared they built a big fire and stayed up all night keeping the fire burning to keep it at bay. Just before daylight it finally left. They never did know what it was but dad thought it must have been a bear.

Once grandpa Burhead was riding a horse up from Wendover. The road went around the mountain side. The road side was steep over the hill and up the mountain and there was a big laural thicked there. It was a mooneless night and it was pitch black. Something jumped out of the bushes and onto the back of his horse behind him. It stayed on the horse and he was half scared to death. Now, he had traded for a couple of chickens and had them tied across his saddle horn. He finally realized it was after the chickens so he cut them loose. When the chickens came off the saddle the thing on the back of his horse jumped off to. It was probably a ‘panter’ or a bobcat dad said.

There were hundreds of these stories told around the heating stove on cold winter evenings or on the front porch on cool summer nights. Who, what, when, and where? Daddy knew them all by name, keith, and kin. What a great shame that I didn’t realize their value until he was no longer here to tell them!

Things I learned from my mother…

To always go to church … we didn’t have to ask if we were going on any given Sunday (morning or night) or Wednesday … there was no question about it.

To be good to my husband … she and dad did not argue, fuss, fight or air any dirty laundry and they always showed affection for each other.

To work and how to clean … she always worked hard keeping her house clean and tidy; it was never an embarrassment if someone came by unannounced.

To be hospitable … visitors were always welcome in our house. When the church had a visiting preacher, he stayed with us. The kids slept on the floor (for as long as he needed our bed) and were happy to do it. She fed us all and included the neighbor kids when they were playing near our house.

About human relationships and human nature … mom understood that when girls are mean to you, they are jealous; and some people can only be friends with one person at a time; bad things do happen and there is no use just worrying yourself crazy; and sometimes you just have to laugh.

To be independent – depend on your own husband and take care of your own … she didn’t expect anyone else to take care of her 4 children, her home, her garden, her house. Then Mom took care of her own mother when she was no longer able to live alone and care for herself.

And, when the unthinkable happens, to survive with courage, pride, and grace…

*Vickie*

An Heritage from the Lord

I just spent two days at Bev’s and enjoyed so much being with her, Mom, and the kids.  Lindz is such a little lady.  Baylee wanted to be wrapped around Lindz’s neck from the time she got in from  school.  Lindz took care of her just like a little mom.  She always helps me so much when I am watching Baylee – – lifting her to me, changing her, preparing her milk and food.  I spent some quality time with Lindz and Sam while I helped them with homework – – and Whitney too!  Baylee was not to be left out.  She got her pencil, came to my lap, sat and “wrote” on paper the entire time we did homework.  It brought back memories of evenings filled with children and homework – – well, at least when Riley was younger.  The girls never did homework until the last years of high school when they had to do portfolios and papers – lol.

I, too, want to join in with Larry C. in encouraging help for those in Haiti.  Some of the congregations here are also sending their 5th Sunday contribution to Haiti via Estes church of Christ.  We have been to Estes; Riley has preached there and is preaching there again at the first of February.  They are the ones who sponsored one of his mission trips.  Most of his professors worship there.  Encourage your children to take part in this effort as well.  When we were talking at Bev’s, Lindz was so touched by those people and was begging to be allowed to help them.  It doesn’t matter if it is just a couple of dollars – – let them feel useful; besides, they say those people live on about two dollars a day.    Thanks and God bless!

By the breath of God . . .

First of all, I do not wish bad luck or suffering on anyone; however, I have been glad to finally have winter!  I know, I don’t have to be out in it – – my husband tells me this frequently -lol.  But as we have all discussed over the last few years, we really enjoyed the winters when we were growing up. They were fierce and frigid with mountains of snows, roads that were gleefully turned into sledding challenges and skating rinks, and icicles that hung so long from the eaves of the houses we could casually reach out and break off a small piece.  Of course, we were children so what did we know, right?  But the snow that came on the 18th and lay on the ground through Christmas eve, BESIDES the fact that we lost electricity and people were really struggling, was beautiful and thick, and the flakes fell on my upturned face in huge drops, as Riley and I stood outside gazing at the night sky and thickly laden trees.

This dry, soft, and very tiny snow that set in almost a week ago has not taken our electricity, thankfully – yet.  It has snowed fairly regularly, but what snow finally dances its way to the ground has taken days to deepen to an inch or two (I know I live here on this volcano, as everyone accuses because I have the warmest spot in southeast KY), but I presume others have only minimal accumulation (in eastern KY).  It is the bitter cold and brutal winds that have engulfed 2/3 of the country that is bringing its own problems; however, the spotless, sparking snow is still beautiful.

Of course, as Larry says, I don’t have to be out:   I have my warm flannels, throws and house shoes I got for Christmas, along with a very comfortable home and a warm bed at night;  I have the internet and computer to stay busy with my next series of Sunday school lessons (Acts – The very first church and its growth); I have my books (right now, ‘Peter the Great’); I have TV shows (you have to get creative in this department with all the regular shows on vacation) and football games; I have my OCD covered – – you all know how I obsess over one certain food or snack and have to have a plenteous supply in my cabinets – – well, the only store that carries my latest candy obsession – Payday Avalanche –  ran out.  The owner said he would order more and when Larry stopped, he bought the entire box!  Doug said, “I will order two boxes next time.”  lol  I still have bags of my Dove milk chocolate and caramel, though, and two large boxes of oatmeal, so I am good – lol!

All joking aside, God’s world is beautiful.  “For He says to the snow, ‘Fall on the earth’; likewise to the gentle rain and the heavy rain . . .From the chamber of the south comes the whirlwind, and cold from the scattering winds of the north. By the breath of God ice is given, and the broad waters are frozen . . . the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven . . . [to] water the earth, and make it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower and bread to the eater”  (Job 37 and Isaiah 55:10).     I hope you all are staying warm and cozy and somewhat happy : )

December is . . .

December is so hectic.  There is much to do and so little time:  there is the shopping for gifts in stores that are full of nothing; or surfing cyberspace for just the right deal without having to spend a fortune in shipping;  there is the shopping for food . . . buying up candy-making supplies, and just the right snacks and crafts for Sunday School class, and groceries for all the Christmas dinners and parties.

Then, we must put up our ugly little tree (for me, lol; most others, I am sure, have a big and beautiful tree) and buy at least a few new decorations.  All the wrapping paper and bows and bags must be bought, and don’t forget the tags and tape and tissue paper . . . then there is the job of getting everything wrapped, and in the process forgetting exactly who one of those gifts is for (??) and realizing you neglected to buy something for someone else!  Oh yes, and the joy of tracking errant packages to discover that one you have been waiting for was delivered to your front door six days ago!! (Now, you all know that I don’t like dogs anyway, right?  So, how do you imagine I feel about them after searching and finding my errant package with absolutely no packaging on it at all and the contents ground in the dirt and chewed and wallowed until it is mistaken for another object!  NOT LOL ing).

The house must be cleaned, and cleaned again, and cleaned again – – after the tree-trimming, and after the gift wrappings, and after the candy-making, well, you get the idea.  The Christmas cards must be bought and signed and sealed and mailed or hand-delivered.  There are the parties, pre-Christmas family or friend gatherings and dinners, and school programs and plays.  By the way, Larry’s company Christmas party was fabulous fun!  It was a semi-formal affair at the London Country Club (which of course entailed buying a new outfit!) with great food, generous gifts (all the ladies received Bath & Body Works gift cards, and all the men a coat with the company name on it), and uninhibited (thanks to an open bar) karaoke and dancing – – as you can imagine, I DID NOT participate in either of those three activities.  Vickie said she was very glad I did not drink, dance or sing, and I said, “Yes, and most especially we are all thankful I did not sing” – – although my dancing would have been a feat as well!” – lol.

Did you notice the common denominator in all those paragraphs – – words like ‘shopping’ and ‘buying’?  And besides all the money spent, there are countless decisions to be made (and since I am a bit obsessive-compulsive, decisions come very slowly to me) and the numerous plans to be laid.  And somehow (??), I am the party-planner/organizer for our family!  Plus, all this must be done in addition to all the other obligations and tasks that one must regularly do from day to day, and the church functions – – buying and filling of food boxes for the needy, buying and filling of fruit and candy bags for the children, church dinners and open houses (for you Vickie).

Oh yes, did I mention that December is hectic? (lol)  But, it is fun and filled with warmth and love and doing good.  It is a time of closeness with family and friends and reaching out across the miles with letters and cards and pictures.  It is sad and heartbreaking because of the ones that are missing, and sometimes can be difficult to get through, but that same sadness brings us closer to each other and makes us realize how much we love each other and want to be together.  The gifts are secondary.  However, snow would be nice!  The fun part about all this hecticity  (new word?) is our wonderful family!  Hope to see many of you at Mom’s this saturday the 19th.  Travel safely and may God bless each of you!

Keeping in Touch

We had a nice Thanksgiving.  As is our tradition, we went to Larry’s sister, Janice’s and enjoyed the holiday with his family.  My mom and Bev usually go with us, but they are battling upper respiratory infections and as Janice is undergoing chemo, they did not go with us this year.  They came to Renda’s and I got to visit with them on Friday afternoon and Saturday.  Riley was also home for nine days, and that meant Natasha was around more.  To me, that is always what makes a wonderful holiday – – family.

Larry, Riley and I had an evening out at the movies.  We watched 2012.  Very good graphics and action and some symbolism to the first time the world was destroyed by water.  We enjoyed it.  Riley preached on Sunday and we had a pizza hut lunch with Renda and her family, then Riley gathered all the clothes that was in his room – – floor, chair, bed, etc. , crammed it in a bag, stuffed his books and computer in his backpack and was ready to go – lol.

Hope everyone else had a great thanksgiving as well!

A Sad Loss

This past Sunday another of our neighbors passed away – – David Lewis who was married to Joann Pace Lewis.  He had cancer and died within days or weeks of finding out (I haven’t been able to ascertain how long he has known, but it was a very short time).

I remember when the Lewis boys first crossed our path; I think I was twelve years old and still employed by my parents as Vickie’s chaperone (LOL).  David and his two brothers came to Hurricane on their motorcycles and ended up connecting with some of the girls.  At that time, Bobby, the youngest was smitten with Kathy and Paul was head over heels for Vickie.  Mom always joked that Vickie’s first boyfriend (referring to Paul – – was he the first, Vic?) carried her Barbie dolls home for her (in an overnight case so he had no idea what he was transporting).  Later, Paul married another ‘Hurricane Girl,’ and David married Joann.  Before that, though, they livened up some of our Hurricane parties.  That was back in the day when kids did not automatically get cars at age sixteen, nor did they have to have movies, roller-skating, etc. for entertainment.  Most young people socialized with those on their particular ‘creek.’  Thus, all the young people that lived on Hurricane Creek would get together for wiener roasts at the abandoned one-room school building, or parties at various locations on the creek.  The majority of us were cousins so we were thrilled to have boys from another area come to join us.

I have fond memories of those times and of David.  My sympathy goes out to Joann, one of the sweetest, friendliest people I have ever known.  She was Riley’s Algebra teacher throughout middle school and is exceptional at her job.  They had four children – – JP, Jed, Rebecca and Sarah.

Mountain Medicines

It has been a while as most of us have just been dealing with life and its curves. Our dear mother has been coping with the effects of a mini-stroke (or two) and vascular dementia so we have been caring for her.  It is a joy to report that at present she is much better, and in many ways, has returned to her normal state of health and cognizance, although still unable to return to her home.  Renda is making long-term plans to keep her, and I too will open hearth and home to her.

Our mother’s only sister, Dorothy, is also facing serious health issues including heart problems, for which she had a pace-maker implanted on Monday (6th), and also some loss of short-term memory, probably a result of vascular dementia, but possibly something more as hers is different than Mom’s.  They are now 73 (Mom) and 75 (Dorothy)(or will be in June).  Dorothy’s daughter, Sandy, a victim of RA, is in a very serious state of health.  She was in hospital for about ten days (just getting home at the end of last week) due to infections and vomiting which threw her diabetes out of control.  While hospitalized, they had to give her blood and much antibiotics, one of which caused a severe reaction restricting her breathing to the very edge of death before they could resuscitate her.  Also, Dorothy’s daughter-in-law, Ellen, is waiting for test results of a biopsy.

It feels very strange to report all these things and to realize that we are the older generation now (at least, the middle-aged group).  Our parents have become our grandparents, and we have become our parents.  Mom said to me, “I thought I would be older when I took my mother’s place.”  I think all of us can relate to that thought.

I was thinking of our many illnesses today and it led me to the memory path and all the ways our grand-parents and their fore-fathers battled disease.  Here is just a sampling of some things our grandfather, Ott Bowling, listed in an interview in the mid to late eighties:

1.  For blood poison (gangrene) we used peach tree bark boiled to strong ooze made in a poultice with corn meal bound to the wound.

2.  Black tea root was used for kidney and heart disease.

3.  Gold Seal (Yellow Root) teas were used for mouth ulcers, throat ulcers, stomach ulcers, and internal bleeding.

4.  Fried onions and camphorated oil poultice was rubbed on back and chest for Pneumonia.

5.  Bone set and Burvine teas were for colds.

6.  Wild cherry tree bark soaked in water with small amount of whiskey and honey for coughs.

7.  Brown paper soaked in vinegar bound around sprains.

8.  Pine rosin plaster for common back ache – cloth between rosin & skin.

9.  We used a salve made of lard, sugar, and turpentine for fresh cuts (they’d never get sore); and salve made of tallow and burnt alum for external sores.

10. [We] chewed root of ginseng for stomach cramps and swallowed the juice.

11. For lack of iron the old timers would go to the black smith shop and get the dust of iron that collected on the anvilblack, tie it up in a cloth and boil it, strain it, then drink the tea.

12.  Black root (Indian hemp, heart plant, north and south plant):  Wash the roots and shave inch long pieces of bark off the roots, enough to make heaping tablespoon and put in a vessel with one pint of water. Let simmer, not boil, and take one tablespoon full three times a day; at first, it has a strong laxative effect, then settles down to a mild action.   “I know of one man turned out of the hospital with a hopeless case.  He had swelling feet, legs, abdomen, face, and was cured with this and lived 25 years after, and [then] died of cancer.”

Submitted by Gail

January Birthdays

We would like to send out a ‘Happy Birthday’ to several family members with birthdays in January.  Aunt Jewel (6th) has always been very special.  She has never seemed like an older aunt, but more like a close friend.  At the same time, she has always provided wisdom and a Christian perspective when going to her for advice.  She is our ‘double’ Aunt being both our dad’s sister and our mom’s brother’s wife; thus, she is doubly loved and appreciated.  By the same token, we have a closeness to her girls, our double-first cousins.  This unique family relationship creates a bond that is closer than average cousins.  Teresa (11th) and Sonya (25th) hold a special place in our hearts almost as intrinsic as  natural sisters.  Teresa is loving and kind, generous and good-humored. With her, you never have to guess where you stand because she is open and honest – – even about the bad things.    Sonya is quieter, keeping things a little closer to the vest, as the saying is, but just as warm and giving and fun-loving.  Another cousin, Sandy, celebrates her birthday on the 28th.  Sandy bears the cross of her debilitating rheumatoid arthritis and all the side effects this disease and its medications bring; yet, one never hears her complain.  She faces life with joy, laughter, and much patience.  Lastly, Larry Cole’s birthday is the 20th.  He became a part of an all female family (except for our dad) in the early seventies and has been a true brother and son ever since.  He fills a role for us that we never even knew we missed.  To all of these, our loved ones, and to any other that we may have neglected to mention, we wish you the greatest of birthdays, and many, many, many, many more!

A Year in the Life . . .

One year ago tomorrow, 2008 was new, clean, and empty; there were 365 days to fill with living.  They passed, however, in the blink of an eye.  Those days are gone forever and the words and deeds of each are stamped in history.  Looking back, we see so many wonderful things, yet some sorrowful.  We think  of our failures, but also our successes; our wasted time, yet also the profitable hours; our tears and laughter, heartache and humor, despair and hope, darkness and light, sickness and health, death and life, and many God-given blessings.

The year began on a sad note when Gail’s sister-in-law was diagnosed with terminal cancer.  However, we are blessed to have her with us still, and although her prognosis continues to be bleak, she is living life to the fullest. The early months also brought the loss of three family members:  Aunt Nola passed away suddenly in February, Uncle Len lost his battle with age and Alzheimer’s in March, and Tommy succumbed to Lou Gehrig’s in April.  The blessing is found in the fact that all three were faithful Christians and now are at peace and rest.

There is a portion of scripture that says in essence that we have life backwards.  We rejoice at the birth of a baby and mourn at the death of a loved one; however, it should be the other way around.  The death of a saint is precious and a babe is born into a world of adversity, trouble, and woe.  Still, we rejoiced at the births of several new additions to our family:  Kira Lin Sizemore made her entrance on January 22; Taylon Karoline Pennington arrived on April 24; Baylee Camren Beckner’s advent was August 21; and October brought the births of Kayden Nichole Hurt (15th) and Sean Dawson Baker (25th).

We were also blessed in 2008 to have Sandy, Carolyn, and Lindsey overcome serious illnesses, and to have Judy and Sonya survive a potentially fatal car accident.  Gail and Maggie both sailed through (sort of) gall bladder surgery, and Glenna had knee surgery.

Several family members embarked on new pathways:  In February, Vickie took on a new job working for a real estate appraiser.  In May, Olivia graduated with a BSN from East TN State University, moved to Chattanooga, and began her career as an RN.  In May, Riley spent two weeks doing mission work in Brazil.  This was his second mission trip, so not necessarily a new pathway, but it was a totally unique and exceptional experience.  In July, Natasha opened her own beauty salon and in five months has developed it into a thriving, competitive business.  In September, Sheena married Shannon Hurt and the two began preparing for their new family.  In December, Zac graduated with a BS in education from TN Tech University and is now considering options (Middle School) while Kristin continues to pursue her education major as well.

In June, we canceled our Bowling reunion due to the loss of loved ones and the difficult treatment Lindsey was undergoing, but in September we had the Stidham reunion as always.  Because of our losses and difficult times, we were expecting a smaller crowd than usual, but were pleasantly surprised to have over 70 people gathered for a day of family, fun, and feasting.  In the past, we have had various extended family members, but this year, all but two were direct descendants of  Harrison Stidham and Mallie Lewis.  There was at least a score of small children present making us feel secure in the future of the Stidham clan (lol).

It is not really possible to reduce a year of life to a few paragraphs.  There have been a thousand bounties, some that we appreciated and savored, others that we barely noticed, some that slipped by unseen.  As we look back and reflect, there are only two things that really matter:  did we live each day as a blessing from God and fill it with the best we had to offer, and did we treat each other with love, compassion, and kindness?  Of course we made mistakes.  We are a family and with that comes problems, personality differences, pet peeves,  etc.  That is what unconditional love is for (lol).  We just incorporate certain things into our traditions – – sitting up too late the night before reunions and other celebrations, stressing out during the final preparations for Christmas and birthday dinners, smiling and shrugging behind the backs of those who complain that we take too many pictures, sneaking off to vent our frustrations with our dear and wonderful mother.  With all its flaws, our family is still the best in the world and we are thankful for every day we are given to be together!

**Submitted by Vickie and Gail